The heavy burden that cannot be carried alone

 The heavy burden that cannot be carried alone

 

 

“So Moses said to the LORD, "Why have You been so hard on Your servant? And why have I not found favor in Your sight, that You have laid the burden of all this people on me?  …  "I alone am not able to carry all this people, because it is too burdensome for me” (Numbers 11:11, 14).

 

Check for symptoms that persist in you at least two weeks: (1) continuing depression, anxiety, or emptiness; (2) lost interest and excitement of hobbies, the things I had fun time including sex, (3) desperate feeling, pessimistic thinking, (4) guilt, no value or helplessness, (5) sleeplessness, early morning wakefulness or excessive sleep, (6) decreased appetite, weight loss, overeating or weight gain, (7) Feeling weak, tired and sagging, (8) Thinking about death or suicide, attempting suicide, (9) Nervousness, easily annoyed, (10) difficulty in concentration and memory, difficulty in making decisions, (11) headache, digestive disorders or chronic pain, etc., (12) physical symptoms that do not respond well to treatment continually.  This checklist is a depression symptom checklist.  If you checked more than two on the list above, you have a sign of early depression.  And if you checked more than five, you have severe depression (Internet).  After reading this article and looking back at myself, I wrote on my personal Facebook homepage: "Today's Facebook Discussion Question: Depression?"  The reason I posted it was to discuss the depression with my Facebook friends.  And one person said: ‘I think I am depressed.  My body and my mind are so tried that everything that is given to me is not a gift but a burden.  I just want Jesus to come soon even though my hope is little bit different from the healthy believers’ hope of Jesus’ second coming.’  As I was reading this comment, I could not help but agree that “everything that is given to me is not a gift but a burden.”  I thought whether I consider my beloved wife and three children as burden instead of gifts from God.  I also thought my church members whether I considered them burdens instead of gifts from the Lord.  Although all my family members and church members are God’s precious gifts to me, but I cannot help but confess that there was a time when my dear family and church family would be considered burdensome to me.  And the reason didn’t have to do with them but myself.  In other words, I have considered my precious family and the church members as burdensome not because of them but because I am disappointed and depressed as I see myself as a leader of the family and the church.  So one day, when I was sing the hymn “I must tell Jesus”, I cried because my heart was very heavy.  Especially when I sing the hymn chorus, I remember praising God with heartache: "I must tell Jesus!  I must tell Jesus!  I cannot bear my burdens alone; I must tell Jesus!  I must tell Jesus!  Jesus can help me, Jesus alone."

 

In Numbers 11:11, 14, we see Moses suffering from heavy burdens.  He said to God, “Why have You been so hard on Your servant? And why have I not found favor in Your sight, that You have laid the burden of all this people on me?” (v. 11)  Moses considered the 600,000 Israelites as a burden rather than a gift (v.21).  Why did Moses consider the Israelites as burdens?  The reason is that the Israelites wept again and grumbled, saying “Who will give us meat to eat?” because the rabble who were among them had greedy desires (v. 4).  When the people wept throughout their families, each man at the doorway of his tent, Moses was displeased (v. 10).  Can you imagine 6000,000 people weeping?  In my experience, when my three children were babies and when they were crying, I am sure my wife had hard time but I also had hard time as well.  But when 600,000 Israelites were crying at their doorways, I am sure Moses was very troubled.  That was why Moses said to God, “Why have You been so hard on Your servant?  And why have I not found favor in Your sight, that You have laid the burden of all this people on me?” (v. 11)  Moses laid down his agonizing heart to God and said “I alone am not able to carry all this people, because it is too burdensome for me” (v. 14).  Moses was no longer able to bear the number of Israelites alone.  Therefore, he even asked God, “So if You are going to deal thus with me, please kill me at once, if I have found favor in Your sight, and do not let me see my wretchedness” (v. 15).  Moses pleaded with God to die.  Doesn’t it seem that depressed a person is asking for death?  When our hearts are crushed by our heavy burdens, and we are unable to carry our heavy burdens alone anymore, we cannot help but be in despair.  At the same time, we can no longer trust God, and are disturbed in doubt and distrust.  Moses also seemed to doubt the power of God.  When God told the Israelites that they would eat meat for a month until it comes out of their nostrils and becomes loathsome to them (v. 20) because they grumbled and said “Who will give us meat to eat?” (v. 4), this was what Moses said to God: The people, among whom I am, are 600,000 on foot; yet You have said, 'I will give them meat, so that they may eat for a whole month.'  ‘Should flocks and herds be slaughtered for them, to be sufficient for them?  Or should all the fish of the sea be gathered together for them, to be sufficient for them?’”  When I think about Moses' position, I think it is the understandable question to God.  How could Moses get meats in the wilderness that could feed 600,000 people for a month?  As Moses said, where could they get flocks and herds that could be slaughtered for 600,000 people for a month?  And how could they gather “all the fish of the sea” since they are in the wilderness and not the sea?  Then God said to Moses: “Is the LORD'S power limited? Now you shall see whether My word will come true for you or not” (v. 23).  So what God did first was He took the Spirit who was upon Moses and placed Him upon the 70 men from the elders of Israel so that they could bear the burden of the Israelites with Moses (vv. 16-17, 25).  And then God fed the Israelites meat for a month until it came out of their nostrils and became loathsome to them (vv. 31-33).  Is God’s hand short?  The words of Isaiah 59:1-2 came to my mind: “Behold, the LORD'S hand is not so short That it cannot save; Nor is His ear so dull That it cannot hear.  But your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, And your sins have hidden His face from you so that He does not hear.”  Our iniquities have made a separation between God and us.  What are our iniquities?  It is a complaint and a grudge in our discontent against God and the servants of God.  What is our sin?  It is our distrusting God and disobedience to His commandments.  In the end, our grievances, complaints, disbelief, and disobedience not only make us dwell in a spiritual depression, but also make our spiritual leaders dwell in spiritual stagnation.  And one of the fundamental causes is that we live in a mixture with the people of the world and are greedy as they are (v. 4).  We must bear in mind that "when lust has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and when sin is accomplished, it brings forth death" (Jam. 1:15).  After all, the greedy people were buried in Kibroth-hattaavah because the anger of the Lord burned against the people and He struck them with a severe plague (Num. 11:33-34).

 

The Lord Jesus continues to invite you: “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Mt. 11:28).  Our Lord, the God of salvation, who delivers us from the burdens of this world, as He did to the people of Israel out of the heavy burdens of the Egyptians (Exod. 6:6-7).  In particular, our Lord is God who saves us from the heavy burdens of our sins.  And our Lord is the Lord who bears our burdens daily (Ps. 68:19).  Therefore, let us cast our burdens to the Lord (1 Pet. 5:7).  The Lord who saves us will care for us and will give us rest from all our weary and heavy burdens (Mt. 11:28).  Our Lord will give us rest (v. 29).  Our Lord will revive our discouraged souls (Ps.19:7).  The Lord is our strength (Jer 16:19).  Therefore, we will confess, "I love you, O LORD, my strength" (Ps. 18:1).